A love song on your birthday

July 1, 2011

Dear Christina Hayden
I know it’s your birthday …and yet I can’t see or be with you today…I miss you terribly
I spend nights thinking of you…I know everything is predestined, I know that the way things happened I never meant it to happen that way, you were the apple of my eyes and my only goal was to make you happy-and I did the opposite- I know and I apologize for it
What happened – I know neither you nor me would ever have wanted it to work out that way!
Something’s can’t be helped. life has its own way of dealing cards-.I do know that I have tried my best to mend things with you -so I could spend the rest of my life with you
I wish you had just given me the chance to explain but now you are away from me and I can’t wish you a happy birthday personally!
I wanted to shower with you gifts this day, I wanted to put a smile on your face, I wanted to hug you and tell you I would never leave you-that I wanted to be with you till the end of time- I cant do that anymore so I write this letter
And I don’t know if you will ever read this Christina Hayden, I do wish someone sends this to you….just to let you know that you are my world and will always be till the end of time.
I want you to know that you were always the one for me…I was (am) prepared to be there for you, through old age ,in sickness or in health, through pain and pleasure-no matter what I will still be there
I love you Christina Hayden and I will always will, you could hang me and kill me, it would not make any difference in how I feel about you –I would still be there for you. I am your Violin –so play me as you will!
I listen to the songs we shared and all it does is make me love you even more and realize how incomplete I am without you
I see our pictures of st Vincent and all the dreams we shared
I see your smile and how I used to make you laugh with my stares, in all we have been through, in all experiences we shared -the one thing that always made me smile was your smile- it was blissful! Worth every effort to attain it!
And yet you might hate me, think ugly things of me…blame me, and wonder how can someone like me who claims to love you betray me?
How could all we shared by lost so easily…? I take blame for it all! All of it is my fault!
And on this special day Christina Hayden, I want to wish you a very happy birthday; it is today that such a wonderful woman as your self was born.
It was today that the angels sang their heavenly songs.
You are special in everyway and I wish the best for you, May happiness, love and bliss come your way-every single day of your life
I love you and hope you are okay and doing well at your job. I am sure you are excelling and I am sure
Again Happy birthday!


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